Embarrassed

I wasn't planning on writing any more before Yom Kippur, but I just heard a story that made me so sad and embarrassed that I just feel the need to pass it on.

A friend of mine went to get gas for her car here in Passaic at one of the gas stations on our Main Avenue. In New Jersey, it's a law that the attendants have to pump your gas for you, i.e. full serve. However, her car was acting up and was requiring constant attention, so she told the attendant that she would take care of it, and she got out of the car and filled the tank herself.

After she was done, the attendant came up to her and asked her if she was Jewish. She answered that she was. He told her that he hadn't been sure, because she was so nice to him. He said that most of the Jewish people who came to the gas station acted like he didn't even exist. Didn't speak to him, look at him, nothing. And if they did, it was very negatively. He said he felt like they saw him as less than human, as a monkey. He went on and on, while my friend tried to give some unsatisfactory reasoning for the behavior of her fellow Jews.

I was so sad to hear this story. In a community such as Passaic, where there are non-Jews who live right next to myself, and a lot of other Jews, it's embarrassing to hear that this is the attitude we are seen as having - as looking at others as if they are not human, rather than treating everyone with respect.

Even if this attendant's report is exaggerated, that his perception is much worse than the truth, he has been treated poorly by his Jewish customers, of that I have no doubt. And now he is surprised by a Jew who is polite. Which is terrible.

I think we each (Jew and non-Jew for that matter) should take a step back and look at how we treat others and what conclusions they might draw from our actions. I hate the idea that an Orthodox Jewish community is seen by its neighbors as treating everyone horribly, as sub-human. That is certainly not what G-d intended.