Mourning the Loss of my Coffee

It's a fast day. I really miss my coffee. Not even just the caffeine aspect, which I could really use right now. But also just the warmth, the smell and the waking up to a creamy, yummy cup of warm coffee. I guess I'll really appreciate it tomorrow.

Mommy

My co-worker who doesn't usually work on Fridays brought her son and husband into the office for a few minutes to grab some information that she needed. Her son and husband were sitting at her desk while she was using someone else's computer. Another co-worker went over to say hi to the three-year-old.

He wasn't so interested in being friendly. He took one look at her and starting calling out for his mommy, who was on the other side of the office. It was interesting to me that his father was standing right next to him, yet all he wanted was mommy.

LOTD

Today's is an oldie but goodie (ok, not that old, but kinda). The LOTD is brought to you by the Counting Crows who I saw at Oak Mountain Ampitheater back in my original college days in Alabama.

Here's Mr. Jones:

I was down at the New Amsterdam staring at this
yellow-haired girl
Mr. Jones strikes up a conversation with this black-
haired flamenco dancer
She dances while his father plays guitar
She's suddenly beautiful
We all want something beautiful
I wish I was beautiful
So come dance this silence down through the morning
Cut up, Maria! Show me some of them Spanish dances
Pass me a bottle, Mr. Jones
Believe in me
Help me believe in anything
I want to be someone who believes
Mr. Jones and me tell each other fairy tales
Stare at the beautiful women
"She's looking at you. Ah, no, no, she's looking at me."
Smiling in the bright lights
Coming through in stereo
When everybody loves you, you can never be lonely
I will paint my picture
Paint myself in blue and red and black and gray
All of the beautiful colors are very very meaningful
Gray is my favorite color
I felt so symbolic yesterday
If I knew Picasso
I would buy myself a gray guitar and play
Mr. Jones and me look into the future
Stare at the beautiful women
"She's looking at you.
I don't think so. She's looking at me."
Standing in the spotlight
I bought myself a gray guitar
When everybody loves me, I will never be lonely
I want to be a lion
Everybody wants to pass as cats
We all want to be big big stars, but we got different
reasons for that
Believe in me because I don't believe in anything
and I want to be someone to believe
Mr. Jones and me stumbling through the barrio
Yeah we stare at the beautiful women
"She's perfect for you, Man, there's got to be
somebody for me."
I want to be Bob Dylan
Mr. Jones wishes he was someone just a little more
funky
When everybody loves you, son, that's just about as
funky as you can be
Mr. Jones and me staring at the video
when I look at the television, I want to see me staring
right back at me
We all want to be big stars, but we don't know why
and we don't know how
But when everybody loves me, I'm going to be just
about as happy as I can be
Mr. Jones and me, we're gonna be big stars...

Turkey Seder

My co-worker is planning on being in Istanbul, Turkey for Pesach and wanted to see if he could find a seder to go to. If anyone has any connections in Istanbul, specifically the Sultanahmet area, for either families or synagogues, please contact me. Thanks!

Change of Tune

It's amazing how, in the couple hours since I last posted, my mood was switched (no comments about how women are moody!). What's even more amazing is the event that put me in a good mood was the same as the one that made me a little melancholy (not the same exact event, but in the same category).

Bittersweet

Those moments that you feel happiness and sadness, all rolled into one. It's amazing how things come full circle, or kinda maybe. Or not at all, but they've just changed so much it feels that way. Don't worry, I'm not even making sense to myself right now :)

Visitor

For the past couple weeks, we've had a visitor in my office. She doesn't show her face very often, but she leaves her calling card all around. Her name is Jiminy (not my choice, my co-worker chose it) and she's a mouse. I'm sure she's very cute, but I have to admit that I would kind of prefer she had chosen a different office to visit. But maybe she will soon.

Jews Buying In

A friend sent me this article about Jews celebrating Christmas, and I just saw that Orthomom posted about it also.

Hooray (I guess) for the marketing people who have managed to completely retailize (it's a new word) and materialize and take every inch of possible spirituality out of the holiday. So long to people celebrating holidays for their original intention. I guess Jews should be happy that the holiday being celebrated here is not a Jewish one, that Jewish holidays have maintained a small (and I think more than small) semblance of what they are supposed to be about. I am not sure whether I would prefer having Jews celebrating Jewish holidays in such a manner, or whether I prefer them celebrating Christian holidays as such. I don't like the idea of Jews celebrating Christmas, but it seems to me that's not really what they are celebrating - they are celebrating the attempt to fit in and not be left out when it comes to getting presents and decorating their homes all pretty (something I do understand, I can't deny).

It's a form of peer pressure and I don't think Jews are choosing Christmas over Rosh Hashanah, I think they are just having trouble not taking part of such a huge cultural activity. Not that I think it's right, or that I will have a Christmas tree in my home any time soon. And honestly, reading the article has made me think twice about the lights I have around my cubicle.

Little Miss Sunshine

I just finished watching the movie "Little Miss Sunshine." It was excellent. I don't want to ruin it for anyone who is going to go see it (and you should), but the lesson I took from it is, "Embrace your craziness. Life is much more fun that way."

LOTD

Today's LOTD are courtesy of Collective Soul.

Reunion

Change will come
Change is here
Love fades out
Then love appears

Now my waters turned to wine
And these thoughts I have
I now claim as mine
Im coming home

Change has been
Change will be
Time will tell
Then time will ease

Now my curtain has been drawn
And my harts can go
Where my heart does belong
Im going home

Menorah Meme

Soccer Dad tagged me with the menorah meme. I know I'm a little bit late, but this is the first opportunity I had.

Here's my menorah on the final night of Chanukah:


The truth is, I don't have any great story about it. I've had it for a long time, I think it might have been a Bat Mitzvah gift. But some years I use it, some years I use others that I have (this was the one I could find this year).

I do, however, have special Shabbos candlesticks. And since the last night of Chanukah was also Shabbos this year, I took pics of those also.



The candlesticks in the front were a gift from my father for my 21st birthday, very shortly before I departed for a couple months in Israel. The pair in the back were a wedding gift to my great-grandmother. I would like to get them restored at some point, but I find them very special since they have been in the family and passed through several generations. And in general, I love looking at candles burning, so it makes my Shabbos very special to light them.

There ya go!

Maybe I Should Have Been an Engineer

Our fax machine has been in desperate need of attention. It not only needed a new toner cartridge, but it also needed a new drum unit. I had ordered them recently, and assumed that our admin guy who likes to mess with things like that had put them in. But the qualify of the faxes we have been receiving were testament to the fact that he hadn't. So I took it upon myself to give the fax machine the much-needed TLC it so obviously was craving. I replaced both the toner cartridge and the drum unit and now our fax machine is as good as new. It wasn't traumatic or tearful. It just worked. Yay!

Six Months

Finally read this article, an interview with Noam Shalit, the father of Gilad Shalit, who was kidnapped six months ago. The article is touching and sobering. Let's not forget that everything is definitely not back to normal just yet.

Grades are In!

Yay! I got A's!

Chanukah Gift

My boss, who I sometimes have trouble dealing with, just came up to me to ask my opinion on two sets of necklace and earrings. I told her which one I preferred, and she gave it to me! Happy Chanukah! She said she thought the best way of giving a gift is to have someone pick it out for themselves - and it is totally me - flowers :)

Kindness Happens

Fires, wars, murders, drugs. Too often, we read in newspapers and see all over the TV and Internet the bad things going on in the world.

But what really makes the world go round is kindness, those little acts that often go unnoticed by all but those involved. Because these small acts don't get published and publicized, people often don't believe they actually happen. So it's time to share! So I (with a little help)have started a new blog - Kindness Happens. It is for posting those small acts of kindness that you do for others, or that others do for you. Hopefully, in having this group effort, people will be able to read about a number of kind acts happening daily and will feel better about life, and then hopefully, in turn, go on to carry out kind acts of their own.

We would love this to be a group effort, so if you would like to join in and help out (or have any great ideas, please send me an e-mail and I'll invite you to join the blog.

Tagged

I been tagged by Chuck for a Chanukah meme. So, here goes!

1. Wrapping paper or gift bags? Ummm, I usually don't remember to buy wrapping paper or gift bags, so I tend to wrap gifts in aluminum foil - it's shiny and pretty and you can write on it with a sharpie.

2. Oil or candles? I actually have both kinds of menorahs and prefer oil but have been so busy around Chanukah the last couple years so I end up using the candles I get sent in the mail as part of a solicitation for tzedakah for some organization.

3. When do you take out your chanukkiah? This year, it was the second night of Chanukah (I spent the first year at someone else's house.

4. Latkes or Sufganiot? Sufganiot - latkes make my apartment smell.

5. Apple sauce or sour cream? Sour cream.

6. Favorite tradition? My family used to make massive amounts of Chanukah cookies to give out to everyone. Actually, they still do, I'm just not there anymore.

7. Chanukkah cards? Sometimes I attempt to send out e-cards, but it didn't really happen this year.

8. Best thing about this time of year? Everything is sparkly and pretty.

9. Worst thing about this time of year? It's very cold outside.

10. Favorite Chanukkah Story? Ummm, Judah and the Macabees?

11. Favorite Chanukkah Song? That dreidle, dreidle, dreidle one is good. Actually, I really like Maotzur, it sticks in my head for a while after hearing it.

I don't usually tag people, but consider yourself tagged if you'd like. Happy Chanukah!

Purple

Last night I was asked my favorite color. Previously, my answer has been that my favorite color is blue with purple a close second. It dawned on me last night that that is no longer true - purple has trumped blue and is now in the lead. Lucky for me, my co-worker just declared that purple is the new black, so I'm all good :)

Haaretz Article

My non-commenting reader sent me a link to the Haaretz article detailing a woman's report of being beaten for not riding in the back of the bus, that many other bloggers have been talking about for some time. I do wonder at the discrepancy between the woman's report and the bus driver's, but regardless, if it was in fact a non-separate seating bus, this woman had every right to sit wherever she wanted to. And, to hear that it was claimed that it was a lack of tznius (modesty) for her to sit amongst the men makes me wonder where exactly in the Talmud or Torah is states that women are not allowed to sit amongst men on buses. This is a bus we are talking about, please remember, not a synagogue or any kind of religious service, where separate seating does have some justification. Furthermore, if her claim is true, where the heck does it say that it's fine to abuse and use violence against someone for doing something you don't like? I think it might even be against the Torah to use violence against a woman for sitting in the seat you want. And to do this in the name of religion...well, it unfortunately makes me think that Dawkins has a point...(sigh.)

4th Day of Chanukah

I almost forgot - the 4th day of Chanukah - the 28th of Kislev - is my Hebrew birthday! I once had a guy try to argue about this with me, he claimed my birthday was the 29th, but nope, he's wrong, it's today. So happy Hebrew birthday to me.

Stream of Consciouness

I've been at work for over three hours now and I think I have yet to do any kind of actual beyond restarting my boss's computer for her. Not that I'm complaining, it's been a good opportunity to catch up on e-mails. Which reminds me, I need to send one. Anyway, if anyone has time, go check out Bryant Park - they have a bunch of crafts booths set up there and there is some really cool stuff. I bought myself the kind of purse that I have been looking for, for a really long time.

On a completely unrelated note, I think I'm going to make latkes tonight, but rather than going the traditional route, I want to use sweet potatoes. Anyone have a good recipe for me to not follow? Oh, and speaking of recipes, check out the Kosher Cooking Carnival - my amazing peanut butter chocolate chip cookie recipe is included. Which reminds me, Thursday is cookie day at work. Yay for cookie day!

LOTN

This one is LOTN because it's Lyrics of the Night, and apropos to that, this is Shawn Mullins, Lullabye. Good night, sleep tight, don't let those bedbugs (yuck!) bite.

She grew up with the children of the stars
In the hollywood hills and the boulevard
Her parents threw big parties; everyone was there
They hung out with folks like Dennis Hopper & Bob Seeger & Sonny & Cher

Now, she feels safe now in this bar on Fairfax
And from the stage I can tell that she can't let go and she can't relax
And just before she hangs her head to cry
I sing to her a lullaby

I sing everything is gonna be all right
Rockabye, rockabye
Everything is gonna be all right
Rockabye, rockabye
Rockabye

She still lives with her mom outside the city
Down that street about a half a mile
And all her friends tell her she's so pretty
But she'd be a whole lot prettier if she smiled once in a while

'Cause even her smile looks like a frown
She's seen her share of devils in this angel town

Everything is gonna be all right
Rockabye, rockabye
Everything is gonna be all right
Rockabye, rockabye
Rockabye

I told her I ain't so sure about this place
It's hard to play a gig in this town and keep a straight face
Seems like everybody's got a plan
It's kind of like nashville with a tan

But everything's gonna be all right
Rockabye, rockabye
Everything's gonna be all right
Rockabye, rockabye

Everything is gonna be all right
Rockabye, rockabye
Everything is gonna be all right
Rockabye, rockabye

Everything is gonna be all right
Rockabye, rockabye
Everything's gonna be all right
Rockabye, rockabye, rockabye
bye, bye
Bye, bye

City Girl

One of our techs, who I only see on an occasional basis, just found out that I'm from Alabama (he's a fellow Southerner, from North Carolina). He said that he thought I was a city girl! First time I've heard that one.

Being a Celebrity Tops the Charts

A rarely commenting, but regular reader sent me this article that states that kids rank being a celebrity as the very best thing in the world; following far behind in the number 10 slot is God. Interestingly, 10-year-olds ranked wiping out violence as being the number 1 thing they would change about the world. I'm a little confused, because in the article, God is listed as the most famous person in the world at one point, and then only 10th most famous later in the article. But He certainly ranks in the top ten at the least. I'm a little disturbed that kids think being a celebrity is so great, but I can't say I'm completely surprised, and it's probably kinda normal. It's only later you find out that celebrities are pretty messed up. And even then, I think a lot of people think it would be fun. Anyway, enjoy!

Autobiography in Five Short Chapters

By Portia Nelson

(My professor read this in class and I thought it was good enough to share.)

Chapter 1
I walk down the street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I fall in.
I am lost...I am helpless.
It isn't my fault.
It takes forever to find a way out.

Chapter 2
I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I pretend I don't see it.
I fall in again.
I can't believe I am in the same place.
But it isn't my fault.
It still takes a long time to get out.

Chapter 3
I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I see it there.
I still fall in...it's a habit.
My eyes are open.
I know where I am.
It is my fault.
I get out immediately.

Chapter 4
I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I walk around it.

Chapter 5
I walk down another street.


How many of us are brave enough and wise enough to learn from our mistakes and change our bad habits?

HUGE Weight Off

I feel SO good today - it is such a humungous weight off my shoulders to be done with school for an entire month. I had my final class last night - it was very interesting, more will be written about it at a later date. I got my grade on my presentation for last week - my professor gave my partner and I the highest grade in the class and said that the collaboration we showed was excellent. All in all, it was a good semester, but I am glad it is over with. Now, onto Chanukah! (Which I had actually forgotten about.)

Family Programming?

I saw a billboard similar to this one on my way into work, advertising the "family" show "Wildfire", shown on the ABC Family channel:



The actual poster I saw had the chick in the center, with two guys in the background and a caption asking "Which One Will She Choose?"

Now, I admit that I have absolutely no idea what this program is about. I've never seen it, nor even heard anyone talk about it. But, I am disturbed that this is advertised as a family show while having such steamy marketing associated with it. I consider family programming to be shows that I wouldn't mind my 4-year-old watching. (Note - this is mere conjecture, I do not actually have a 4-year-old.) But just one glance at this poster convinced me that I would never want to expose my 4-year-old to that. Something seems wrong with this picture...

Go Grey's!

Congrats to the cast and crew at Grey's Anatomy for being nominated for a whole lotta Golden Globe Awards. I'm pulling for ya, McDreamy (I bet Sarah joins me on this one.)

DONE!

Ok, so I still have to proof-read my paper to ensure there are no glaring grammatical errors, but my paper is done. Complete. Finito. 5,104 words, 17 pages and 355 lines of analysis on a chapter describing a group therapy session. Done. What a relief - now a whole month off!

OnlySimchas

For some weird reason, OnlySimchas (which, if I ever find myself posted on, regardless of the occasion, the person responsible will have some 'splaining to do) will not open up on my computer. The page comes up as blank. It's only on my home computer; from work, all is well and good on the OS site. I figure it could have something to do with cookies, and clearing my cache might alleviate this issue (I don't really know what all these terms mean, but they sound good, no?), but I'm not really willing to give up all my cookies in exchange for the ability to view OnlySimchas. In fact, I feel like my computer might be sending me a covert message, and blocking carefully chosen sites from my delicate eyes, subliminally telling me that OnlySimchas is really for OnlyVoyeurs and those who like to put on big smiles and blissfully announce to the world their business. Ok, ok, it's not that bad, and I do like to check in on occasion to see who's gotten engaged or had a kid. But I can't say I'm crying over not being able to see it at the moment.

Good Teachers

It's amazing what a difference a good professor makes.

In my Tuesday class, I viewed the class as a waste of two hours of my life each week. The professor literally taught me nothing the entire semester that I didn't already know. Perhaps some of the students in my class who didn't have such strong backgrounds in research and measurements learned something, but I didn't. I took maybe one page of notes the entire semester and the one class period that I skipped, I don't believe that I missed anything. I certainly haven't found it difficult to have missed any material.

My Thursday night class was fascinating. The professor completely knew what he was talking about. Now that I (finally) writing my paper, I discovered that the vast majority of his lectures, that I thankfully took good notes on, was completely different material from that offered in the textbook. I wouldn't have been able to write this paper without those notes. I LOVED the class, and learned a tremendous amount.

The outcome - next semester I am taking another class with the professor I liked in exchange for a difficult schedule. I'm passing on the class that was offered at a good time with the professor who taught me nothing. What a difference.

My Fun Office

My office is so much fun sometimes. Granted, it's often boring here (though today I'm not complaining because it has given me the opporunity to get my paper a lot closer to complete), but my co-workers really are cool. Today, I've been given blue tinsel to scatter around, adorning the "holiday" lights I have strung around my cubicle, along with the purple garland and extremely cool blue velvet ornaments that hang over my desk. My other co-worker has strung a chandalier above my head with cool crystals he purchased from the dollar store and now my other co-worker, who is super-creative, has given me irridescent turqoise ribbon to take home and decorate my apartment with. When I complain, I'm going to try to remember this stuff.

Blogger Issues

Blogger hates me. I was having trouble commenting on some blogs, which I attributed to the fact that I am not on Blogger beta while a lot of other people have switched, and the fact that Blogger asks for a google login rather than a blogger one on many blogs. Fine.

My situation is complicated. The e-mail address I have posted on my blog is not the same as my username, because I set up my blogger account long before gmail existed. I later added the gmail account to my blogger one in order to save myself a little anonymity. (Oh, I think I may have figured out a solution to my problem, but probably not.)

In addition, I had once created a gmail account with the same username as my blogger username, but not the same one that I use for my blogger account, which I think was complicating matters. But I never used that gmail account, so I went and deleted it, thinking that would solve my problems. Nope.

So, I decided that maybe I could change the username on my blogger account. Nope.

So, I thought maybe I would finally switch to blogger beta. Not seeing that option anywhere anymore.

So I thought maybe I would e-mail blogger and ask for help. Nope, they don't offer that, at least as far as I can tell.

So, I'm stuck in blogger hell today. Any suggestions for solving this would be greatly appreciated. I've spent way too much time away from my paper already (not to mention the fact that I'm doing this all at work, but obviously I don't care about that).

Response to LT

Blogger is not my friend today, as it is obviously being selfish and not wanting me to comment on other blogs, just to post on my own. So, LT, an apology for posting this here and not in your comments, but it's the only thing I could figure out at the moment.

LT (of DaBoys) posted about why he doesn't believe in dating (go read it first), and here is my more than two cents (how come I can write this and not my paper?):

Nevermind, I kinda got it to work, but I am still having major issues between Blogger, Gmail and Google accounts. Head on over and read the original at DaBoys.

Space Station

This is so cool. I so want to be an astronaut and get to float around in space, fixing things, doing experiments, seeing the stars without the distraction of an atmosphere.

Unfortunately, the closest I think I am going to get is enjoying the glow-in-the-dark stars on my ceiling every night when I turn out the lights. Which I do love. But who knows - some day, maybe I'll get there :)

Striving

I made a friend recently who has endeared himself to me very strongly (in a very platonic way - don't get excited). I was trying to figure out exactly why I have such affection for this person. He has a very giving personality, so that definitely is part of it. But it's more. I realized that, while this person admits that he has made mistakes in the past, he is working incredibly hard to not make the same mistakes again. He is striving to better himself and be a person that he is proud of. And that takes a lot of guts. I really admire him for it; it is quite inspiring.

LOTD

Except for the whole Jessica Simpson thing, which I will never understand, John Mayer tops my list. I just can not get enough of his music. So, the lyrics of the day are courtesy of John:

Slow Dancing In A Burning Room

It's not a silly little moment
It's not the storm before the calm
This is the deep and dyin breath of
this love we've been workin on
Can't seem to hold you like I want to
so I can feel you in my arms
Nobody's gonna come and save you
we pulled too many false alarms

We're goin down
and you can see it too
We're goin down
and you know that we're doomed
my dear
we're slow dancing in a burnin room

I was the one you always dreamed of
you were the one i tried to draw
how dare you say it's nothin to me
baby, you're the only light I ever saw

I make the most of all the sadness
you'll be a bitch because you can
you try to hit me just hurt me
so you leave me feelin dirty cuz you can't understand

We're goin down
and you can see it too
We're goin down
and you know that we're doomed
my dear
we're slow dancing in a burnin room

Go cry about it why don't you
Go cry about it why don't you
Go cry about it why don't you
my dear, we're slow dancin in a burnin room
burnin room, burnin room
don't you think we oughta know by now
don't you think we shoulda learned somehow
don't you think we oughta know by now
don't you think we shoulda learned somehow
don't you think we oughta know by now
don't you think we shoulda learned somehow
don't you think we shoulda learned somehow

Almost There

I have two days and one class left in my semester. Unfortunately, I also have 10 pages more of my paper to go. Which would be fine, if I wasn't also working. But I am starting to see that light at the end of the tunnel. Now if I would just stop proacrastinating by blogging, maybe I would get there...

AOTD

It's been a while, but Google gave me the impetus for a new "artwork of the day." So here's Edvard Munch's "Scream":

Reason I am in NY

There has been much talk lately about the assets of small and out-of-town communitites, which I wholeheartedly agree with. But there are reasons to live here in the NY area, which I realized last night.

Last night seven of my friends and I went out to dinner for my birthday (unfortunately, two people couldn't make it at the last minute). I was graced with the presence of friends from Passaic (of course), Lakewood, Morristown and Queens. We had a blast! We laughed and ate and everyone sang happy birthday to me (and the waiter seems quite taken with our table, claiming that we were his favorite of the night).

And I realized, this is why I'm living here. This is where my friends are now. While my heart still belongs to Baltimore (and most areas South of the Mason-Dixon line), for now, I belong here. I guess there are some good points about NY after all.

Frum Agnostic?

Extremely interesting discussion going on over at XGH. I don't generally take part in commenting over there, mainly because it's a little confrontational and way too fast-paced for me, but my feeling about the post is that absolute knowledge and belief are very different things and absolute knowledge of something, especially religious beliefs, is an extremely difficult thing to possess. I think that most intellectually honest people have to question some of what is offered up as Orthodox Judaism, but that doesn't necessarily mean they aren't "frum" or even "religious." It means they are really thinking.

Alternative to Intellectual

My friend and I were talking last night and we were trying to come up with an alternative to the word "intellectual" to describe myself and what I'm looking for in a guy. Intellectual isn't quite accurate, because it conjures up images of, honestly, kind of a nerd. And while I do like very much to think and read and learn lots of stuff (and am admittedly kinda a nerd), I also can be fun and free-spirited and enjoy glitter. I'm thinking more along the lines of describing myself as someone with an inquisitive mind, but I'm not sure that's any better. Any suggestions?

Runs in the Family

To my parents who have recently started reading this blog - I am warning you now not to read this post, as it contains information that I don't want to be responsible for letting you know. Ok, disclaimer done.

Just received this in an e-mail from my "baby" brother:

I got my exams today and tomorrow; only three. I'm not studying, nor will I, but no worries. I got this.

Hmmm, I guess it runs in the family...

Machane Yehudah

Arutz-Sheva offers a photo essay of Machane Yehuda, making me even more jealous of SaraK's upcoming trip. Enjoy the pics!

Little Sympathy

Is it wrong that I don't have a huge amount of sympathy for families asking for charity to marry their children off? When I know that the money is going to go to support a married couple who will have a bigger wedding than is necessary, where the husband will likely not be working, the wife will also very possibly not be working, and despite the fact that they will be living off the charity of others, they will not hesitate to have a child within a year of marriage, and probably not stop there.

Wouldn't it make more sense to find these couples jobs so that they can support themselves and send them to financial management classes? Wouldn't it have been a better idea for the parents who are in such debt that they can't afford the expenses of a wedding and setting up a life for their child (which, if you ask me, shouldn't be the responsiblity of the parents anyway, I think if someone is ready for marriage, they should also be prepared to support themselves) to have their children working in order to help support the family and/or saving up for when they do want to get married?

I understand that learning Torah full-time is an ideal, but it is also an ideal for families to be self-sufficient, rather than living off the charity of others. I think the system of huge families living in poverty and passing down the tradition to their children is faulty and needs repair, soon.

Slow Going

My paper is moving along very, very slowly, in part because I'm quite tired and therefore having a hard time focusing and in part because it's just taking an enormous amount of information from a lot of different sources to write, which I usually enjoy, but also usually have developed more thoroughly before beginning to write. Oh well, I'm sure it will get done somehow, even if it's at the last minute. (I'm sure NONE of my readers know anything about procrastinating, right?)

Attended a very, very nice, but slightly sad going-away party for a wonderful family moving to Israel in a couple weeks. I'm in awe of the courage it has to take to pack up everything and move across the world, jealous that they are going to live in the Holy Land and sad that they will be gone from Passaic, because they really are a great family.

Maybe one day I will join them - who knows!

Ten Full Minutes

of my life completely wasted on hold with Barnes & Noble. I just want to know if they have a specific book in stock before I go there. I know it's probably insane this time of year - but 10 minutes? And it only ended because I hung up. The actual total amount of time wasted is yet to be decided, as I'm currently on my 2nd call to them, still awaiting news of whether my book is in stock. Ahh, the holiday season.

Final result - 15 wasted minutes - they don't have the book in stock. Glad I didn't drive to the store.

Down to Work

At least that's the plan. I have a paper to write, have managed to do very little prep work so far. So, right now, I'm supposedly working on it. Can't you tell? For some reason, while it should be an interesting paper, I have very little motivation to actually do work. But I've decided that if I manage to do at least a couple pages, I get a great reward - football!

(I must admit it is kinda difficult to focus on a paper when I have the Pussycat Dolls "Dontcha" playing - it's just a bit distracting.)

Sparklies

My co-worker got me sparkly lip gloss and eye shadow for my birthday. It's so cool. She also got me pretty blue butterfly barrettes for my hair - she knows me so well :)

Some Random Thoughts

- Huge sigh of relief. I gave my presentation for class tonight. I think it went pretty well, if it can be at all judged by the feedback of my classmates (who would never say anything negative anyway). Now I just have one big paper left and then winter break! Woo Hoo!

- It is COLD out. I left class tonight and all of a sudden I was freezing. No matter what LT says, I have absolutely no affection for cold weather. Winter could pass right by without me missing it.

- I'm going to write a lot more about my group counseling class once it's completely over next week, but I had a really interesting experience in our session tonight. There is another Orthodox woman in my class, and her presence has unnerved me a bit all semester, mainly because for two Orthodox Jewish people, it would be difficult to be on more opposite sides of the spectrum. We actually discussed it a bit in our session tonight, and I found it fascinating how our perspectives on the whole situation were so incredibly different.

- Tangentially, I also found it interesting that while everyone in the class knew that this other woman was an Orthodox Jew, not everyone realized that I was. That one surprised me.

- Has anyone tried this switchover to the new Blogger? I'm nervous to try it.

- Soon (I hope) I'll go to sleep and wake up a year older, which is weird.

From the Inside Out

This is WAY cool. Hat tip - my dad :)

Note - It isn't the most tznius thing ever, so if you are easily offended, please don't click on the link.

Catching Up

A friend suggested earlier that I google my name to see how many hits come up. I did so, and found a new link that I hadn't seen before. It was to the Alumni Association of the Honors Program at the college where I began my undergrad career (while I finished the Honors curriculum, so I suppose I do qualify as an alum, I didn't end up completing my degree there). I had e-mailed the administrator of the program at one point as told her about what I was up to, and she had included my information in one of their newsletters, which is now posted on the web. Reading through the updates of different alumni, I'm struck by both how long ago it was and some of the amazing things that the people I once attended class with are now up to. I had to admit that I was glad to be able to have an inclusion; for a long time, I had hesitated to keep in touch with the group, for fear of being seen as a "drop-out." Maybe I'm not doing my PhD or my medical residency yet, but I know I do have what to be proud about also. (Even if it's not that last sentence.)

LOTD

In honor of the fact that she can now become a rabbi in the Conservative movement (except for the whole not being Jewish thing - oh well), today's LOTD is from:

Melissa Ethridge
Come To My Window


Come to my window
Crawl inside, wait by the light
Of the moon
Come to my window
Ill be home soon

I would dial the numbers
Just to listen to your breath
I would stand inside my hell
And hold the hand of death
You dont know how far Id go
To ease this precious ache
You dont know how much Id give
Or how much I can take

Just to reach you
Just to reach you
Just to reach you

Come to my window
Crawl inside, wait by the light
Of the moon
Come to my window
Ill be home soon

Keeping my eyes open
I cannot afford to sleep
Giving away promises
I know that I cant keep
Nothing fills the blackness
That has seeped into my chest
I need you in my blood
I am forsaking all the rest
Just to reach you
Just to reach you
Oh to reach you

Come to my window
Crawl inside, wait by the light
Of the moon
Come to my window
Ill be home soon

I dont care what they think
I dont care what they say
What do they know about this
Love anyway

Come to my window
Crawl inside, wait by the light
Of the moon
Come to my window
Ill be home soon

Cool People

A certain person was questioning his coolness. So, I told him that I would blog about how cool he is. So here ya go - you are officially cool now.

Chocolate

Yesterday, late in the day, one of my co-workers offered me chocolate since she saw what a bad day I was having. And not just any chocolate - Ghirardelli squares - yum! It made things much better.

So today, when it was someone else's turn to have a meltdown, as we in the midst of planning our escape from the world of landscaping and into the world of playing music in the subway, I remembered the cure for meltdowns - chocolate! The remainder of the Ghirardelli squares were procured and distributed. Now all is back to normal.

As a future therapist, I'm making a permanent note of the therapeutic effects of chocolate.

Scary? Me?

My boss is scared of me. After my meltdown yesterday, she won't look at me now and she keeps hesitating before asking me to do the most basic facets of my job. I'm not positive that this is a bad thing - I've long thought that my boss should learn how to find the phone numbers for her own clients. But I do feel a little bad about it. And it's just funny to me, cuz I really don't think I am scary. Just ask anyone who knows me - right, Ezzie?

Breath of Fresh Air

After my really long day of ups and downs, school stress and work stress galore, there were a few positive spots to note.

- My friend hasn't been feeling so well, so I made her soup and we had one of the most honest conversations that we've ever engaged in. It's weird when your thoughts come out of someone else's mouth, especially when you've been thinking about them a lot recently but haven't managed to actually verbalize them.

- The friend who called just to show concern (I guess I need to be more careful about what I write on my blog, it seems I manage to scare people). The concern was noted and appreciated.

- And, to end the day, I was called a "breath of fresh air." It felt good.

Watch Out Alabama Chicks

I was chatting with the guy who works at the corner grocery near my office. He was asking me about my plans with my family for Christmas, and I didn't want to go to the trouble to tell him that I don't celebrate, so I told him that I wouldn't be with my family since they live in Alabama and are too far away. He got so excited and told me how nice people from Alabama are. He then said that he wanted a girlfriend from Alabama. Trying to get out of there without a date, I wished him good luck, while he started extolling the virtues of Alabama women to the other customers in the store - he said we are nice, and friendly and clean. Before he could go on, I wished him a good day and left. So, if any other Alabama girls are in midtown and looking for a date, check out the Middle Eastern guy near my office - he might make you a nice offer :)

I'm Quitting

I'm having one of those days where I want to covertly break my phone and then act like I've gone insane so no one will want to talk to me. I'm about five seconds away from quitting, and if I didn't have to pay my rent, would probably be on my way home for the day. Oh, and I'm in desperate need of doing my homework assignment for tonight, which I haven't even started.

Well, looking on the bright side - it can't go anywhere but up from here, right?

Mazel Tov!

Go over and wish the Jewish Blogmeister a HUGE MAZEL TOV on the birth of a son!

What a Video!

Check this one out (hat-tip to my favorite 5-year-old's dad):

My Hairdresser Loves Me

Despite the fact that I don't recall giving her my number, my hairdresser just called me up to let me know that she has switched salons. I'm glad she did, because I think she's fabulous, but I am a little weirded out by the stalking factor. Oh well, a girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do for a good haircut,

The Middle

Extremely good article on BeyondBT - check it out.

Reason 962...

Why I don't like New York.

This morning, I was walking through the bus station when I noticed a woman with a really cool purse, exactly the kind I have been looking for, but haven't been able to find. I debated about telling her I liked it, and finally my curiosity about where she got it won out. I looked at her and told her that I loved her bag. She looked back at me with a terrified look on her face - how could I speak to her? I must be crazy! I asked her where she got it, and she replied that it was a gift and practically ran away. I think people in this city need to learn that a compliment is NICE. No need for fear.

"Shoshana'd"

My co-worker just coined a new term - "Shoshana'd," which apparently means being decked out in glitter of the either finger nail polish or eyeliner variety. I brought in my glitter nail polish to work this morning and one of my co-workers, who has a daughter my age, just couldn't resist. So, now she's been "Shoshana'd." I like it.

Luke Johnson Phone Experiment

A friend sent me this video - check it out and make Luke happy - give him a call!



Oops, my friend tells me the experiment is no longer. It's still an amusing video though.

December 1

As everyone in my office keeps pointing out, it's December 1. That means the year is officially 11/12ths over with. Which is nuts. Only 7 more shopping days until my birthday...

Total Embarrassment

Thank G-d, not talking about me this time. On the bus this morning, we got to the last stop and I hear a conversation going on at the front of the bus. All of a sudden, a man gets on and starts quickly moving towards the back of the bus, yelling out a name.

Then I see that he's holding his son's lunch bag in his hand, and calling out to his son, who has forgotten his lunch. I imagine that the kid, an early teen by my estimation, would rather have gone hungry than watch his dad dash on and off the bus, as the bus driver very impatiently was NOT waiting for him to get off.

Poor kid. Well, at least his dad wasn't wearing a red and white knitted golf hat with a pom pom on the top. THAT would have been embarrassing.